Autism is a very misunderstood affliction. Autistic people have extreme abilities and disabilities. My extreme ability is my visualizing logic of sentences, language and ideas - needing to see data as actual objects in the spaces in my mind. But among my disability is the inability discharge such analysis in manners appropriate to the perspective of normal people.
I will argue obsessively in favour of a subject in which I have no interest or belief, simply because of my need to complete my analysis. I have low ability to discern what people actually want me to do, even though I try my best to understand what they want me to do. I can barely tell if people are happy or annoyed with me. I have to revalidate my goals with my management frequently in annoying fashion because try as best as I could, my perspective does not allow me to pursue goals in manners commonly comprehensible by other people.
I know that many autistic people would appear normal and intelligent but would soon reveal ourselves as tangential. And then people would get angry with us because they do not understand the lack of normal perspective we possess, and they would think we are deliberately offending them. Some people, myself included, think that ptsd is an imaginary affliction, yet I have to accept I am wrong - because my experience tells me that people think my autism is imaginary.
The problem is what I see as normal perspective is usually not aligned with the normal perspective of normal people..But I don't see it as a problem. I use the word problem because I see my perspective as problematic to other people.
The actual problem is normal people often appear as autistic and misaligned when viewed in my perspective, so that when I try to execute my life in sincerity to good and kind within the confines of my perspective, I just don't understand why people would get angry at me. What have I done wrong ??? I've had people yell at my face telling me "trying your best is not enough" when I said that I am trying my best.
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